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Things are going so well with G. He is so mellow about most things, very accepting and he just goes with the flow. It is wonderful to be with someone who is not surrounded and consumed by drama. I love being with him, sharing those quiet moments, just he and I. I feel so safe with him, he is the first person that I truly believe will not hurt me. He has somehow changed me in a way that I’m allowing myself to be happy. It is wonderful.
We are going to Mexico on the 20th for a week. Normally, I would be worried about things - what if we have nothing to talk about? What if he gets bored of me? What if, what if, what if? There is none of that! No doubt, no insecurities, nothing. I am so excited to show him my favourite things, and experience new things with him. I know we will have a great time together. I cannot wait to have him for a week, just us, every night together.
You exist, and therefore, you matter. You’re allowed to voice your thoughts and feelings. You’re allowed to assert your needs and take up space. You’re allowed to hold onto the truth that who you are is exactly enough. And you’re allowed to remove anyone from your life who makes you feel otherwise.
|—||Daniell Koepke (via redcloud)|
Lisa Unger, Beautiful Lies (via craving-to-escape)
This. Always always always…this.
I told my family about him this weekend. It went better than I dared to hope it would. Everyone seemed genuinely happy about it. Aaaaand the L bomb was dropped, by both of us. My brother said it was nice to see me happy in a relationship, because he could always tell before when I wasn’t. And he’s right. I have never actually been truly happy in any of my past relationships. There was always something stopping me. Maybe it’s because I have finally let go of hurt caused by my dad and cut him out of my life - I have nothing to prove to him or anyone else anymore.
I’m happy with him. I feel safe. And loved. And I feel like I deserve this. Finally.
I’m going to tell my mom about him this weekend. I’m nervous that she will be mad at me, or at him. I’ve known him since I was 24ish, he’s friends with my step dad, and 14 years older than me. Mom will not approve. I’m 31, but she still thinks of me and treats me like a child. He and I have talked at length, and have decided now is a good time to tell her, before she finds out from someone else. My best friend is coming with me this weekend, and we have come up with a plan. I will sit my mom down with her, and tell her that I’m a lesbian, and my friend and I are seeing each other. I expect a certain level of shock, however knowing my mom, she will eventually say that she loves me, and will support whatever relationship I choose. At that point, I will drop the real bomb on her. Hopefully, hearing that I’m not actually into girls will help lessen the shock of who I am actually seeing. It should be interesting.
We shall see if the doubt rears it’s ugly head after I tell her. I don’t think it will.
Hopefully I will see you next month, my sea turtle friends!
Volunteers help baby sea turtles get to the ocean safely.
via Twisted Sifter
I have some Chinese characters tattooed on the back of my neck - they mean “honesty”. Honesty is something I value greatly in myself and in others. I can almost always tell when someone is lying. I’m used to being lied to. And then things happened with him. He is probably the most honest person I’ve ever known. I told him that I have feelings for him, that it is not just FWB for me. At this point, he had already mentioned the same thing to me. His told me it scares him a little, but that it’s mostly a good feeling. I asked him if he was more afraid of hurting me, or being hurt himself. Both, he said. I don’t know what happens from here, all I know is the doubt and fear I usually have (and choose to ignore) is not there. I feel hopeful. And safe.
|—||Unknown (via namelessin314)|